It all started a few weeks after we got engaged. Once the champagne bottles stopped popping and the phone stopped ringing, all of the questions began rolling in: So, where are you getting married? When? How many people do you think you’ll invite? Our loved ones were just excited for us, but the questions were only stressing us out. What the heck do we know about planning a wedding?
One day, Z and I caught ourselves bickering over some wedding detail (that I don’t even remember). Our little argument was not even a full month after we got engaged. Halfway through the quarrel, we looked at each other . . . and admitted this was crazy. Being engaged and planning our wedding together is supposed to be one of the happiest times in our lives. So why the heck were we fighting?
Right then and there, we vowed to not let the wedding stress get to us. So far, here’s what we’re doing to keep that vow in check:
- Listen to people’s advice, but don’t always take it. It’s OK to say “Thanks for the advice, Mom” and move on. Parents, soon-to-be in-laws and basically everyone you see between now and your wedding day will have advice for you. Listen politely, but don’t forget about your own wants and needs.
- The stress is in the details. Personally, Z and I care mostly about the food and music at our wedding. So, we have chosen to spend most of our planning time on those two details. The flowers and favors? We know our loved ones would be happy to pitch in when it’s time to finalize those details. Focus on what matters to you most, and let others help with what remains.
- Keep it simple. Who’s ever going to notice if there are satin bows on the chairs? No one. I promise you. The fewer details you have to think about or pay for the better.
- Get a good wedding planner. I should clarify: We don’t plan to get one of these, but just about every venue has a wedding coordinator or catering manager, at least. Make sure the place you want to get married has a good one -- we’ve already encountered a few that we know will only make our wedding planning that much more stressful. Their job is to make your wedding planning easier, so scope out a good one.
- Have fun. Seems obvious, doesn’t it? But I know many, many brides-to-be who didn’t have a minute of fun until their weddings were half over. Afterall, your wedding day is a celebration of you and the love of your life -- don’t let the stress ruin this significant time in both of your lives.
Congratulations to all the soon-to-be brides reading this post, and here’s to a [mostly] stress-free wedding!